It’s not unusual for teams to experience conflict: in team sports it can get physical, in rock bands it can end in smashed guitars and in the workplace, conflict can lead to poor performance. Ultimately, conflict within teams can see some members shown the exit. Not all conflict is A Bad Thing – it… Read more
“What’s an ‘amygdala hijack’ – and how would I know if I’ve had one?” Let’s take the terminology first: the term emerged in Daniel Goleman’s best-selling book, ‘Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More than IQ’. Goleman offered an accessible term for the neurological stimulus-response that occurs when the amygdala perceives a threat and… Read more
‘How to handle difficult situations’ is one of the most popular topics on Zoomly’s menu of workshops. Based on the insights gained on both developing / delivering it and the contributions of hundreds of participants, here are some DOs and DON’Ts to help you when a situation gets difficult. DON’Ts Go for a ‘win’ at… Read more
Professor Robert I. Sutton is now known to many as ‘the Asshole Guy’, having given us ‘The No Asshole Rule’, followed by ‘The Asshole Survival Guide’. So if the A-word is too strong for you, look away – and miss out. I like a book that doesn’t mince its words. It’s also good if there’s… Read more
See the situation through their eyes The same situation can be perceived very differently depending on our perspective. Picture what’s going on for the other person – what’s at stake for them? We can assume – wrongly – what their aims are. What positive intentions do they have? Be clear on what you care about… Read more
I’m hearing a lot – and I mean A LOT – at the moment about ‘collaboration’ from different parties. The most vociferous are those disgruntled folk who would really much prefer it if all the different suppliers, partners, contractors, stakeholders, call-them-what-you-wills that they deal with …could just please get on with it. Together. And… Read more
Conflict isn’t something we can avoid at work: from a difference of opinion to an all-out showdown, it’s a fact of organisational life. Sometimes conflict is a healthy debate, leading to an agreement; other times it’s toxic and people get hurt. Typically, our hardwired response is to fight or flight – or simply freeze. But… Read more
When I run our ‘How to negotiate’ workshop, we spend some time brainstorming all the everyday situations when we negotiate with other people. Once participants get the hang of this, they come up with loads of everyday negotiating situations – and that’s important in the context of our training. It means that there are plenty… Read more
What is conflict? Definitions vary wildly – from a difference of opinion to an all-out confrontation. Wherever you find yourself on that broad spectrum, it’s well worth stopping to think about how you handle conflict. Why? Because we tend to default in tricky situations – and often in ways that aren’t helpful. And as differences… Read more